The Femslash Addict

ETA: Some of the movies I've seen and forgot to put on the list. :)

Thank you to lepetit_trianon for the message. You inspired me. :)

Whoever it was that told me I had to watch Spider Lilies as part of my Quest to Watch Every Lesbian Movie Ever, Including the Bad Ones (I'm Looking at YOU, Claire of the Moon) is my hero. Spider Lilies was AMAZING. It might actually be one of my favorite lesbian movies I've ever seen, and you can tell from the following list that I've seen a lot of them. Perhaps too many. :)


Loving Annabelle - loved it; a very sad and beautiful story
Fingersmith - a long one, but amazing and totally worth the wait
Imagine Me & You - cemented my crushes on both Lena Headey and Piper Perabo, plus a great ending
Gray Matters - meh; it made me crazy with Bridget Moynahan and Heather Graham, but I didn't like the ending
Puccini For Beginners - as lesbian/straight girl/straight guy triangle movies go, this one is better than average; certainly worth a look
Kissing Jessica Stein - just like revolos55 said, this movie is awesome until the very last 10 minutes...
The Children's Hour - holy crap, demeter94, I'm so happy I'm not the only one who has seen this movie! Audrey and Shirley are very intense, and what a shocker this film turned out to be!
Desert Hearts - it definitely wasn't bad; something about it made me feel weird and uncomfortable, but I don't know what; still a good movie as lesbian movies go
My Summer of Love - lots of lesbian content, but this movie just creeped me out
The Hours - I thought it was slow and heavy, but at least Julianne Moore was in it
But I'm a Cheerleader - HYSTERICAL, and extremely enjoyable
All Over Me - one of those frustrating, depressing movies that makes you feel unhappy and helpless most of the time, but that might have just been me; an early appearance by Leisha Hailey of The L Word
The Truth About Jane - for a Lifetime movie, this was pretty good, and I love Ellen Muth
Bound - I couldn't really enjoy this one because it was so...ugly, if that's even the right word for it
Claire of the Moon - horribly written, acted, shot, etc. It makes me grimace to even think of it.
It's In the Water - another Nicole Conn film, and this one is better that Claire of the Moon, but not the best I've ever seen by a long shot
A Girl Thing - okay, I confess that the only reason I liked this miniseries is because of Elle Macpherson (HOT), and it's really not that badly done
Fried Green Tomatoes - subtext, my ass; Idgie/Ruth is TEXT in Fannie Flagg's novel, and that's what makes this movie so great
Between Two Women - a subtle film about post-WWII British women; it was a little too subtle for my tastes, but still an incredibly intense and nuanced film
Heavenly Creatures - lots of slightly scary lesbian content that makes my skin crawl, but it's supposed to be that way
Dr. T and the Women - because the gay part is marginal, I didn't put this on the list at first, but I have to say that Kate Hudson and Liv Tyler making out is a beautiful sight
D.E.B.S. - Funny, silly, entertaining, and incredibly hot couple involving Jordanna Brewster. YES.
Saving Face - I love this movie. It was funny and sensitive, and the ending was great. The girls are cute, too. :)
Tipping the Velvet - I'm glad I saw this. It was long, but sooooo good. I might be a little bit in love with Flo. But just like Fingersmith, excellent Sarah Waters adaptation.
Aimee and Jaguar - I was only so-so about this one. Not sure why, especially given my obsession with studying WWII and the Holocaust. Something about the chemistry between Aimee and Jaguar didn't resonate with me.
Spider Lilies - OH MY GOD. Zero Chou is my favorite. This movie was so AWESOME, and every time I think about the love scene, my stomach gets all wibbly feeling. GUH.
When Night is Falling - Beautiful, beautiful film. Great chemistry between the two main female characters.
High Art - I would have liked it better if it weren't for all the drug use. Drugs don't fly with me. But hey, Radha Mitchell is cool. :)
Nina's Heavenly Delights You win, anomalys. You seriously, seriously win. Along with Spider Lilies, Loving Annabelle, Imagine Me & You, and Fingersmith, this is in my Top 5 Favorite Lesbian Movies So Far. Funny, clever, sweet, cute--I could go on. You should know that I am now officially in love with Shelley Conn. *thud*
Fire - Stunning. Absolutely stunning. Charged with passion and social criticism.
Love & Suicide - This is a very low budget, low production quality indie film, but it's pretty decently acted and written, and it has a very long, very effective, very moving love scene. So good I watched the love scene about six times in a row.
Amour de Femme - French movie, awesome chemistry between female leads, but the story is one of those 'married straight woman is torn between two alternatives' movies. And those depress me. :(
Water Lilies - As soon as you mentioned it so_wicked I remembered that I saw it several months ago, even discussed it here. Despite being frustrated, I love this movie.
Personal Best - SO ANNOYING. I hated it. I don't care that it's like some kind of pillar of lesbian film or something. I did not enjoy it. Bleh.
The Secrets - OMFG, The Secrets. Apparently I too have a thing for hot Jews, pocabomba. This movie was so heartbreaking and beautiful. It's definitely one I want to own eventually.
Therese and Isabelle - A kind of experimental movie from 1968. Roommates at an all girls Catholic boarding school. Tragic lesbian romance ensues. Great acting. Okay movie.
Goldfish Memory - DO NOT WANT. It started out well, then ended horribly. Kind of. I had an objection to one character in particular who landed at the center of the lesbian content and who pissed me off because she was a hypocrite.

Movies I've still not seen:
Lost and Delirious
Better than Chocolate
Gia
What's Cooking?
I Can't Think Straight
Kiss Me Again

I LOVE FEMSLASH!!2#!2$3!!!1!

Sorry, got carried away.

In closing, I hope you all have been watching the new season of Criminal Minds. Emily Prentiss no longer has bangs because she gave them to JJ. And everyone? The Emily/JJ is BACK. Not only the lingering gazes and occasional noteworthy proximity, but in the latest episode there was KNEE TOUCHING AND CUP OF COFFEE GETTING. JJ had a rough time on the case, and she seems kind of broody on the plane ride back. Then Emily comes over, puts a mug of some comforting hot beverage down on the table in front of JJ, puts down her own mug, and reaches over to pat/rub/touch JJ's knee before sitting down next to her. They don't speak; they don't need to. JJ just smiles gratefully and they sit quietly next to each other. It's back, y'all. Whatever JJ's pregnancy last season drove away, it's BACK. I could die of the squee. :)

Um, new femslash obsession?

Resident Evil. I've seen the first movie and Apocalypse now, and I can't think of enough femslashy sentiments to describe Alice/Rain and Alice/Jill and Alice in freaking general. I will watch Extinction this weekend, and I am beyond excited. Ali Larter? Yes, please. Tell me you all are on board with the Resident Evil femslash bandwagon. Also, the video game is pretty awesome, too. Played RE4 and loved it. :)

Harking back to what I said a little while ago about Degrassi and Palex? I give up. I used to have my DVR programmed to record any reruns on The N, but after "Lexicon of Love," they only show episodes where Paige and Alex are not together or are breaking up or other horrible things. I used to want to know how things ended for Paige and Alex when their time on the show was up, but now I don't. Therefore, I resolved to stop obsessing over it and just live in "Lexicon of Love" for the rest of my life.

Okay, anyone out there into Kim Harrison's Hollows series? Because OH. MY. GOD. Rachel/Ivy FTW. Seriously. I have certain pages in certain books in that series dog-eared and well-worn. WOW. You may also find this interesting. When I read a book, I have to "cast" a person, usually an actor but every so often a person I actually know, in each character's role. I try to follow whatever physical descriptions I'm given, but sometimes I override that because I have somebody who just seems to fit. So, Rachel and Ivy? Aubrey Dollar and Rhona Mitra. I could not help myself. The combination was just too damn hot to resist. So sue me. :)

Before I retire for the evening, I want to express my extreme indignation and disappointment at the disgraceful lack of Emily/JJ on this season of Criminal Minds. It's like, as soon as JJ got pregnant, they completely pulled the plug on any and all previous connection Emily and JJ had built up and developed up to that point. POOF. Gone. Unbe-fucking-lievable.

I don't honestly know what to tell you about this film. It is incredible, but I feel like if I tell people to watch it, I would be partially responsible for the inevitable pain and suffering that would result.

My god. A solid 85% of Water Lilies is comprised of sexual tension so palpable and freaking powerful that my heart was actually, literally pounding through much of the film. I mean, throw a bunch of teenagers into locker rooms together, and things are going to get insane. But this movie handles things delicately, poignantly, thoughtfully. One shy, reserved teenage girl falls in love with another teenage girl who specializes in toying with everyone, both emotionally and sexually. Picture that with all the intense sexual tension I mentioned, and by the end of this movie, I felt permanently damaged. Because, as with so many teenage love affairs, especially the tentatively homosexual ones, it ends as you might expect.

So, a really well made film with an engrossing story and performances so genuine that I could hardly sit still, but it might break your heart and leave you with this wounded feeling for a while.

...

But I think I would watch it again. And own it. And torture myself with it on a regular basis. Because OH MY GOD, the girl-girl tension...!

Or a huge disaster, depending on how I value my sanity and/or emotional stability.

Because now? I can watch copious amounts of Degrassi TNG. And obsess over Paige/Alex. Just watched "Death of a Disco Dancer" and nearly expired. Just imagine how I'm going to feel when I see "Lexicon of Love"! Paige vexes me sometimes, but I am officially head-over-heels for Alex. Exactly the kind of girl I wish I could have been in high school (or I wish I could have dated...or married...or had babies with...or something like that). So yeah. Welcome me to the Palex Nation, everyone.

Another side effect/benefit of my cable upgrade is the plethora of Facts of Life episodes now available to me. Having watched only a couple of season 5 episodes, I feel I can now announce that Jo is the GAYEST GAY GAYER THAN GAY CHARACTER IN THE HISTORY OF ANYTHING EVAR. Every single thing about her screams "I LOVE WOMEN!" and "I LOVE BLAIR!" Is Nancy McKeon gay? Because if she's not, she picked a really freaking gay way to portray Jo as a character. The swagger, the mannerisms, the protective inclinations, the clothes (my GOD the clothes), the motorcycle--I could go on. I can practically see the visions inside Jo's head when she and Blair are squabbling and getting all tense in each other's faces. Something along the lines of grab Blair roughly, shove her up against something, tell her to shut up, and then make her shut up with your lips. And other things. So, yeah. Also welcome me to the Jo/Blair Nation.

Now, I am off to finish watching CSI: Miami, coveting Natalia and Calleigh and all that jazz.

Then, I will be watching a Cannes festival film called Water Lilies. Will have something to say about that, I'm sure. :)

Well. If you like to watch movies where one woman falls in love with another woman over the course of 90 minutes of tension, awkwardness, pain, suffering, and depression, then Losing Chase is the film for you.

It's not even so much that it was a badly made film. Helen Mirren and Kyra Sedgwick are great, of course. But it was so, so awkward and horrible. Only watch this movie if you're a masochist. If not, just watch the relevant clips on You Tube.

GAH.

So, I just finished the first two seasons of Dexter, a really great show, by the way.

Sometimes, I catch myself having femslashy thoughts about Deb and La Guerta. Anyone else familiar with this show, and if so, what are your femslash-related thoughts? Or just thoughts in general?

On the list of movies involving a lesbian storyline where things don't go well for the lesbian, you can add Love on the Side. I don't know what possessed me to watch this movie, as it was obvious from the plot description that it wouldn't go well for the gay girl. But I think the sheer adorableness of Marla Sokoloff won me over, and I watched the damn thing. Ultimately unsatisfying and a little depressing, but it does have a decent kiss and this one scene involving toplessness and sketching and a whole mess of sexual tension that kind of made me feel like I could jump out of my skin. But alas, it was all for naught. So, skip that one if you have a better movie to watch.

This is completely random, but you know that CBS show The Mentalist? The only reason, and I mean only reason, I ever feel like watching that show is because of Amanda Righetti. OH MY GOD IN HEAVEN. Fucking gorgeous. Like, the kind of drop-dead gorgeous that makes it hard for me to think straight (HA, I made an unintentional pun!). And while I don't really care for Robin Tunney, her mere presence on Mentalist with Amanda Righetti gives me femslashy thoughts. :D

Okay, must get myself to bed now. :)

Seriously, this movie is just so damn depressing. Heather Graham is so adorable, and I can't stand watching Gray fall in love with Charlie when it's all going to end so badly. I just can't stand the guy/girl/girl love triangle convention. It never ends well for the lesbian. Ever.

Speaking of Heather Graham, have any of you seen her kiss Jessica Stroup in Broken? It's only about five minutes of an otherwise unpleasant and strange movie, but it's absolutely the best five minutes of the movie and possibly some of the best minutes of my life.

Look! I found it on YouTube! The sound is out of sync, but this is the best quality clip I could find. And really, the sound isn't even the best part. :D

Hi to anyone who might still be watching this LJ. I do realize that about five months have gone by. I know I've said that graduate school combined with my job really started getting in the way of everything, and that's part of it, but there's more to it than that.

Not sure if anyone was ever curious, but I want to say something about myself and what made me start this blog in the first place.

Although I go by fraidy_bat and The Femslash Addict on the internets, my name is E. Or at least, that's what it starts with. I guess I don't feel comfortable telling everyone my real name. But then, I'm not comfortable with a lot of things. So call me fraidy_bat, Femslash Addict, or E. Whichever. :)

I was born into a dysfunctional family that really screwed me up. When the parental unit responsible for the family dysfunction died suddenly about five years ago, it complicated everything even more. I've struggled with clinical depression for several years, and it has its ups and downs. The last six to eight months have been unbelievably difficult for me, sending me to a very low place. This is a big part of why I stopped posting.

I don't know everything about who I am. I know that the usual labels don't fit me at all. I do, however, know one thing. I love femslash. It resonates with me. I see it everywhere. I can't help but giggle and squee about it. I may not know what the hell to do with myself and my strange life, but I know that femslash makes me happy.

So, if I go away sometimes, it's not because I am suddenly no longer addicted to femslash. That's pretty much never going to happen. It's because life sometimes gets more complicated than I know how to handle.

And so, on a less personal, less awkward note:

THANK YOU to everyone who insisted I watch Nina's Heavenly Delights. I LOVED that movie. It's replaced Loving Annabelle as my most favorite lesbian movie evar. Just wonderful. Well-written, well-acted, Scottish accents, funny jokes, beautiful cinematography, excellent story, and a very satisfying relationship payoff. Thank you, thank you, thank you for being stubborn and making me watch it. :)

Fire was also quite good. It was heartbreaking and sweet, and incredibly provocative. Great performances. Really a positive movie experience.

And so, I think I will attempt to post here again. After all, how can I keep my mouth shut when ALEX CABOT IS BACK ON SVU? Not possible. :D

Well. Let's talk about D.E.B.S., shall we?

Completely silly and ridiculous movie, and therefore quite entertaining. I think the " hanging stakeout swings" have to be the oddest spy movie convention I've ever seen, but I was still laughing. Out loud. Quite obnoxiously. Good thing I live alone and my apartment complex has very thick walls.

Okay, um, Lucy and Amy? Killed me. Killed me dead. I think I stopped breathing during the last ten minutes of the movie. The part where they run into each other in the storage room the second time, and Lucy says "We've gotta stop meeting like this," and then they kiss--pretty much one of the hottest, squeeingest things I've ever seen. Yeah.

Also, we can officially add Jordana Brewster to the list of women I'm hopelessly in love with (Sophia Bush, Missy Peregrym, Chyler Leigh, Tiffany Dupont, etc.). The little quirky thing she does with her mouth when she's halfway between smiling and smirking--GOD. Cannot breathe.

Thank you all for pestering me to watch this movie.

Thank you for recommending When Night Is Falling and thus trying to KILL ME. How am I supposed to be able to breathe after watching that movie? HOW? The particular scenario portrayed in this film is pretty damn close to simultaneously being one of my crazy good dreams and one of my worst nightmares. It's complicated. Whatever.

Holy frak. Great movie. Exponentially better than most of the lesbian movies I've seen. Just beautiful.

I hate you all. And I'm sure I'm going to hate you even more once I've seen DEBS. Goddamn.

Begrudging, Frustrated Love,

The Femslash Addict

What I mean when I say 'gayest non-gay' is a character that is never officially declared gay, but gives a viewing audience good reason to question their sexuality. They may even be textually and overtly straight. They may be paired frequently with male love interests. The subject of sexuality or romance may never even come up. But there's something about her, a lack of chemistry with male love interests, a mannerism, the way she carries herself, ambiguous subtext, or perhaps the clothes she wears on a regular basis. She may not be gay according to the official record, but there is definitely something very, very gay about her.

So, I'm going to start the list with my own picks, and these are just names I've been thinking about the last few days. I know there are more, and I expect you all to pitch in. No need to raise your hand. Just call out the answer. :)

Janis Ian, Mean Girls - When they wedge her character into an awkward and sudden relationship with Kevin G. at the very end of the movie, it always makes me balk. I realize that one of the pillars of Janis' character is that she will never get over Regina convincing everyone she was a lesbian and ruining her life, but it would fit the character much better if it turned out that maybe Janis really wasn't in love with Regina at any point, but she still likes girls.
Missy Pantone, Bring It On - Okay, what? Even though being called a "dyke-y loser" was a mean thing to say, it wasn't altogether off-base. Missy seems...kinda gay. Drawing tattoos on herself? CHAIN WALLET? And she seemed really excited to find out that Les was gay, and then she became good friends with him, almost like she was happy to have an ally. And there is no male love interest, not even a hint. Make of it what you will. :)
Haley Graham, Stick It - Speaking of Jessica Bendinger movies, this is another one with a main female character whose sexuality remains a mystery. The only time romance even comes up for Haley is when she is asked if one of her guy friends is her boyfriend. She responds with a fervent "eww!" She essentially dresses like a guy most of the time (baggy clothes, baseball hats, skater shoes, and not a single pink item of clothing to be seen), her gymnastics leotard being the only notable exception to that rule. She even acts kind of like a dude sometimes, which isn't surprising because she seems to only have guy friends. When the movie ends, I always imagine she goes on to compete in collegiate gymnastics and ends up falling madly in love with her soccer player roommate who may or may not be tall, leggy, and blonde. I've said too much. :)
Emily Prentiss, "Criminal Minds" - I feel like we've discussed this one to death. ;) The clunky giant watch, the obvious subtextual chemistry thing with J.J., the ambiguity surrounding her personal life, and the way she carries herself all indicate that she might, in fact, be gay. Or at least in denial. :)
Sara Sidle, "CSI" - I think this is mostly Jorja's fault, but even if it is, it doesn't ultimately matter. What Jorja Fox does with the character is the character, and Sara has never, ever had an ounce of romantic chemistry with any of her male love interests, and especially not with Grissom, though they play it up like it's the tragic romance of the century. But watch Sara and, say, Catherine? There's actually substance there.
Olivia Benson, "Law & Order: SVU" - I can only echo and emphasize what most of you have already pointed out: gayest non-gay in the history of ever. It doesn't matter how many Regularly Scheduled Hetero Signposts they throw at me. Her walk, the way she speaks and acts, her look, the eyebrow-raising lines they give her, the chemistry with other female characters like Alex Cabot and Casey Novak--all of this adds up to a character who is clearly homosexual, no matter what Dick Wolf likes to pretend.
Lil, Coyote Ugly - It's been a while since I've seen this movie, but obsidian179's reasoning was so good that I'm just going to include it here: "While the only Coyote in the film that gets to have any kind of love interest at all is Violet (not counting Cammie's mentioned but never shown boyfriend), Lil certainly seems to let her get away with a lot, doesn't she? From what she says, Violet was supposed to have one chance, and that's it. Yet, despite screwing up again and again, she stays. Lil's the kind of woman who can out tough guy the tough guys - if you've seen the movie, you know what I'm talking about - and really doesn't dress or act "feminine" at all. During Kevin's second appearance in the bar (where no boyfriend was supposed to be), even Lil mentions that she's fired girls for a lot less then what Violet did. (And do we mention that Kevin was only there because he was upset that Violet never showed up to meet him - costing him a very expensive comic book... look, I didn't write the movie, okay? - because Lil wouldn't let her leave? Sure, that could be because it was a busy night... but really? That's it? Shyeah, right.) And then she goes to offer Violet her job back later. And after realizing that 'Jersey' isn't going to be coming back, she even calls the dillhole Kevin to get him to go to Violet's show. Yeah, those last two could be her just being a friend to a young woman that reminds her of herself a bit... But I don't quite buy it. ;)"
Juliette Paxton and Jess Bhamra, Bend it Like Beckham - The gay non-gay is even central to the plot! Everyone thinks Jess and Jules are gay, and I don't blame them. Good-looking coach aside, I think that once they get to Santa Clara U. without him, they end up with each other. :)
Sofia Curtis, "CSI" - I can't believe she wasn't immediately on the top of my head when I started thinking about this. It took me literally about ten seconds of seeing her for the first time on CSI to decide that yes, she is very, very gay. The swagger, the clothes, the attitude. SO GAY.
Sarah Connor, "Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles" - I just bought the first season and have been watching the series before it starts again next week, and...wow. I think it's a combination of the legendary Sarah Connor mythos and Lena Headey, but damn. I can't even watch Sarah and Cameron in the same room without losing my mind. I think I just have a hard time taking a badass, gun-toting woman like Sarah Connor as being 100% heterosexual. Can't do it.
Jordan Cavanaugh, "Crossing Jordan" - She's kidding herself if she thinks she's straight. Lisa, Lu...and just the fact of Jill Hennessy. Gay.
Faith, "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" - Oh, Faith is absolutely a gay, gay, scary gay non-gay. The sexual tension with Buffy is breathtaking. And she has that kind of swaggery, masculine walk down, too.
Jo Polniaczek, "The Facts of Life" - Oh my god, who were they kidding? Who? Was anyone fooled? She rode a goddamn motorcycle! With leather! Jo was SO GAY. Everything about her was gay. Except for the part where she supposedly wasn't. HA.
Paris Geller, "Gilmore Girls" - I always loved Paris dearly, and part of what I loved about her was the strange relationship she had with Rory. I used to count the number of times the idea of Paris kissing Rory was brought up on the show. And then it actually happened, and that sealed it for me. No one can talk me out of the conclusion that Paris was always secretly in love with Rory. Not ever. :)


So, those are the best ones I've got so far. I want to hear your ideas!

ETA: In my own defense, since many of you were horrified that several of your favorites did not make the initial list, this was merely a starter list. Just to get the ball rolling. I did not forget about Olivia Benson, for heaven's sake! ;)

Addison? Really? I don't get the 'gay non-gay' vibe from her at all. And now I see that it's just me. Odd.

I think I really need to start watching Army Wives. Just the commercials alone look pretty damn gay.

Dude, Reyes? She was totally gay, through and through. But Scully is not gay. Scully and Mulder's love is forever. And that's that. :P